More Quinnspressions

Me: Shouldn't you write your summary now?
Quinn: Don't worry, Mom. I know that book behind my hand.
Translation: He will write the summary later, but not to worry, because he knows that book like the back of his hand.

Me: Come sit down and eat your pork chop.
Quinn: I love chicken!
Me: It's pork not chicken.
Quinn: Whatever. Look out, cow! Here's my mouth!
Me: It's pork - from a pig.
Quinn: (chewing) Mmmmm! Good pig.

The Call

Well, maybe not THE call, but an important one nonetheless. Rachel ditched her first band lesson this week because she wants to quit. Her band teacher noticed and gave her a personal phone call this afternoon inviting her back to sixth grade band.

Rachel says she will "try it for one week . . . because (her band director) called."

Hmmm . . . I might need to have that woman call here when it's time to wash the dishes, change the bedsheets and clean rooms. Just an idea . . .

Leaving

That was Quinn's favorite thing about his first full day of school. This could be a long year.

That Was Easy

I went to Staples today to purchase the new Norton Antivirus 2007. There was a $40 rebate for the $59 item. Then I used my $17 bonus bucks and brought in an inkjet cartridge to recycle, which gives me $3 to spend. I think my purchases were almost free.

I told the cashier that Staples is such a great place to shop and the only way to make it better would be to pay ME when I walk in the door. Her response? "I'll pay you if you take the manager outta here!"

HA! She doesn't know that I'm friends with her manager's wife.

Life 201

Quinn and Rachel missed the bus this morning but were not late for school. Not so for me.

The brand new school building where I work was having a minor difficulty on our first day of school - the air conditioning did not work.

As dismissal began at my school, I received a phone call from the nurse at Quinn's school to tell me he was sick. I brought him home and fed him applesauce and a corn dog. Methinks he is nursing this a bit in order to avoid fourth grade.

The mechanic called to tell us what's wrong with the car. It needs a new computer. A new $900.00 computer. Yeah, well so do I, but now that will have to wait.

On the upside - as soon as this thunderstorm moves through the temps should be more tolerable. We have no debt except our mortgage. The refrigerator and freezer are full of food. We have beds in the house for five and could sleep three more on couches. The new neighbors haven't called the cops on us yet and I'm having a pretty decent hair day.

Life 101

Well, Quinn's fever is still 101 anyway.

The tow truck Found the car On the Road , even though it's a Nissan, not a FORD. Mike just got home. The mechanic thinks he might be able to find out what's wrong with it this time.

I think I annoyed some coworkers today as we were writing a list of "shared values" for the school year. They wanted to include, "We will listen to others' ideas without being judgmental." I said, "NO WAY! I'm all about being judgmental! That's what you teachers do all day! You judge the quality of work, you judge the content of responses and you judge the students' behavior. I most certainly judge the ideas I hear to decide if they are worthy of consideration." Now, I will give them a polite listen-to and fair evaluation, but JUDGING them, we MUST do.

I got no response except this one, "How about this value - We will respond to one another in a kind voice and in a non-threatening manner?"

Am I threatening? Unkind?

I prefer the label "decisive."

Caution

Watch what you wish for. I escaped the conference this morning, during which I would have had to sit for about four hours.

How? Quinn has a fever and a cough.

A friend of mine once wished that he had a job that only required driving to the office to pick up a paycheck every week. Soon thereafter he underwent re-constructive knee surgery and . . . well . . . you know.

Not so Bad

Today was the second of three days of mandatory inservice. It's called a HOPE Summit. (Harnessing Optimism and Potential through Education) I HOPE tomorrow will be better. Today I had to form triads with people I did not know and tell them if I were a punctuation mark, what would I be? And if I were a weather pattern, what would I be?

I'll tell you that if I were a superhero I'd like the ability to be invisible. Then, I could sneak out of that place!!

Otherwise, the van has been bailed out of Midas, Quinn's fever has disappated? disapated? disaparated? (gone away for a while) and I only have about four more hours of sitting tomorrow before I can get to my room and think about getting back to work.

Real Life

Rachel has her alarm set for 6 am so that we can fix her hair for the first day of school. Her clothes are picked out, her backpack is ready and she may even have chosen her breakfast cereal. Mike has taken the day off, which happens to be a very good thing. Why? Let me count the ways:
1. My vehicle is at Midas.
2. Quinn has a fever.
3. I have to be at a conference all day.
4. Mike is fairly calm under stress.

Sorry

Quinn told me it's not funny to make fun of people.

Sorry, Micheal.

Now what am I going to blog about?

Grocery Shopping

Mike volunteered to pick up a few items from the grocery store as long as I wrote them out on a list for him. I wrote: 3 red peppers, 3 sweet onions. He came back with three green peppers and a bunch of white onions.

He tried to make me feel sorry for him by saying that he couldn't concentrate on shopping because he had to go to the bathroom.

Now he's watching golf in his sleep on the couch. It's been a long day already.

Gotcha!

Mike and I took the van to vacuum it at the local car wash a couple evenings ago. I put the three quarters in. I climbed in and around the vehicle at top speed, trying to remove all the State Fair gunk before the timer ran down. Mike shook out a few car mats and made sure the hose had enough slack, but mostly enjoyed standing behind me and watching me work.

After finishing the job, the vacuum was still running so I swung it over toward Mike (accidentally?) connecting with the inseam section of his khaki shorts. I've never seen his eyes get so big or heard his voice pitch so high. Where's candid camera when ya need it?

Good Morning, Sunshine!

What's worse than waking up early on Sunday when you could have slept in?

Being awakened by your husband's shrill screams as your son uses tweezers for the first time in an attempt to remove a stray hair from his father's back.

Days of Rage

My friend, Mrs. Bickerson, says she has about 2.5 days of rage per month. I wonder how many my husband would say I have . . . Unfortunately, these days will coincide with the beginning of school and the three day multi-million dollar obligatory conference. I don't like sitting still.

Nothing Funny

Nothing funny happened today. I have a theory that it's too hot for anything funny to happen. Speaking of unfunny . . . School begins next week. My husband said, "I thought you said you had 85 days off?!"

Well, yeah, I did. Now they're gone.

EWWWW! That's Disgusting!

The boy's at camp during the hottest week of the year so far. You'd think his sister would be overjoyed with the quiet ride home (no one to touch or taunt her) - but no. You know how they say if someone is missing from a group that another person will take over the absent person's responsibilities?

I'm not sure if it was Rachel or Mike who initiated it, but they both started arguing and wrestling (in the van while I was driving). The next thing I knew, Rachel was being punished. Mike used her finger to clean wax out of his ear.

Is this creative punishment or is it punishable by DCFS?

Tweenagers: Tip #1

Never handle a pot full of boiling water and corn on the cob while "discussing" an issue with your tweenager.

A cold shower, much aloe, 28 hours and many ice packs later, my left forearm resembles a bad sunburn.

Toilenated!

We've been toilenated! It's a beautiful sunny day and I looked out the back window to see toilet paper streaming from our little oak tree. Who did it?

RACHEL! She thinks it looks really cool.

Beans

I was talking to a neighbor lady in the grocery store this morning and must have distracted her significantly, because sometime during our little chat she fumbled her find and baked beans oozed onto the floor.

"Oops!" I said, "looks like you spilled the beans!"

Ha! Could ya ever set up a situation like that?! I mean, who gets to say that in a literal sense?!

By the way, my neighbor did not think the situation as funny as I did. I hope she'll still let me borrow her food processor later this week.

No Give-Aways

I'm not going to give away the ending, so you can keep reading (or not).

My predictions given in the previous post were not necessarily in line with book #7, but I must say that I was completely satisfied with JK Rowling's work. She thoroughly explained unanswered questions and gave this reader much to contemplate. I would definitely rank this series comparable with CS Lewis' Chronicles of Narnia.

The themes of love, forgiveness, faithfulness and sacrifice were woven masterfully throughout the series. Well done.

Final Answer

Actually, this is my final prediction about Harry Potter and the ly Hallows:

Severus Snape will kill Voldemort in the final showdown, saving Harry and the wizarding world, intentionally sacrificing himself in the process. As an aside - I believe that Lilly Potter's sister, Petunia Dursley, is magical and that Harry will communicate with Dumbledore through his portrait.

I'm about to wake up Rachel to go purchase the book. I still haven't decided if we will buy one or two.

New Used Car

The Sentra had been acting up for three days. We nursed it to the auto mechanic shop and they drove it periodically through the day yesterday and it reportedly "runs like a champ." We told them to keep it until they figure out what's wrong.

On an unrelated note - Quinn walked to a neighbor's home to let their dogs out (as requested) but ran home worried that people might be watching him "break into the backyard."

"Like, what if somebody calls 9-9-1?! Then what would happen to me?!"

Ummm . . . pretty much nothing.

On another unrelated note - Rachel is at camp so the house is pretty darn quiet.

About Bob -

My friend called tonight and told me about her five-year-old son's imaginary friend, Bob. Yesterday her son and older daughter were arguing loudly about who should buckle Bob's seatbelt. To diffuse the situation, my friend's husband asked how Bob liked church that morning.

Laughter rang out as her little boy explained that Bob didn't get to go to church because nobody let him out of the van! His big sister then triumphantly rationalized that she did not need to buckle Bob's seatbelt because it must have been on the whole time since Bob never left the van.

It's True

I'm a sinner. And in case other kids in Quinn's Sunday school class were unaware of this, he made sure to tell them. He even reported the specific word I used Saturday night when I pulled down the new shade and it unfurled in my hand.

On the way home from church he asked me if he knew all the bad words now or if there are more he could learn from his Uncle Matt.

Family Reunion

I'm sure it's been more than ten years since this crew has been photographed together. Ed, Mike, Sharon, Pat and Cyndy - you're lookin' good! However, it did take a few times for all of them to look in the same direction. Not sure if it was eyesight, hearing or memory . . .

Home Tweet Home

Birdhouses made with the help of PaPa Wayne. Please disregard the air gun. It's use was under close supervision at all times.

Alabama Pictures

Happy Anniversary, Honey! Fifteen years strong. I love you.

They Love Swimming

Here is Quinn with his cousin, Owen. They braved the 70 degree temperatures to have a good ol' time at the local pool. Not sure if they are up to synchronized competition just yet. Still working on remembering not to breath under water.

All About Words

Quinn told me that he was reading a great book about how a knight and his SQUIRREL were fighting to save the kingdom from an evil man. I thought about it a minute before deciding that he must be talking about a SQUIRE. ("Oh, yeah," he replied.)

That's OK. Earlier today he reported that his sister was POSSESSED by baked potato chips. I think he meant to say OBSESSED. Maybe we ought to focus our dinner conversations on things other than Harry and Voldemort.

Disappointed

Overall, I was disappointed in the movie "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix." Where was the underlying theme of love being the most powerful force in the universe and thus the only thing that can conquer Voldemort? Where were the explanations by Sirius and Dumbledore about how some things are worse than dying and how some things are worth dying for?

I know these movies are being made quickly, but don't you think that audiences would sit three hours or more for a properly told story?

Her Shoes are made for Walking

. . . to Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. This will be the fifth movie and we plan on taking the kids. We have read the book together (twice, actually) and I think they are adequately prepared for the intense actions and emotions. Rachel thinks she is going to wake up at midnight and walk (7 miles) to the movie theater in order to catch the first showing. I think she's got a few details to work out in her plan.

By the way, I believe that Professor Snape, although mean and to Harry, is still on the side of GOOD and will actually sacrifice himself in order to save Harry and destroy Voldemort in the seventh book (which releases on the 21st). My second-choice scenario is that Neville will be the hero and sacrificial character. However politically correct it may be in literary themes to off Harry as he simultaneously destroys Voldemort, I just don't think that JK Rowling's child audience could handle that. I don't think I could handle that.

Is it Legal?

I picked up a hitch hiker this morning - but I didn't think it was a hitcher. I saw a very old woman wearing long pants and turtle neck shirt walking in 90 degree heat between the restaurant and the hospital. I assumed she must be walking back to the hospital to visit someone. I pulled over and helped her into the backseat (My children were horrified.). We quickly learned that she was not going to the hospital, but was hitching her way "back home," which was two states away.

Hmmm . . . an angel in disguise or a nursing home escapee?

Quicksand

"Papa! Stop! You're getting in the quicksand!" warned my three year old nephew as my dad stepped into his room yesterday morning.

"What?!" said Papa, "Who told you there was quicksand in here?"

"Mama did," replied Owen. "That's what the carpet turns into when the lights go out."

Interesting strategy for keeping your child in his bed all night, thought I.

Track Star

As he streaked out of the van after riding for nearly three hours, Quinn hollered, "Look out! I'm gonna hurdle!!"

I'm thinking, is he sick or is he going to jump over something?

Rescue

I just extricated my son's tongue from his toy rifle. Not sure why he stuck it inside the barrel. Less sure why he set it and pulled the trigger. Definite shell-shock here.

I made him wash his mouth with hydrogen peroxide and said, "I hope you've learned a valuable lesson about going around sticking your tongue in guns!"

Sounds like the title of a how-to book for parents.

I'd Forgotten

We had a guest with us in the van today. As I was driving down the highway, she said, "Miss Marcie? Can you come here for a second?"

Ha! I'd forgotten how funny it is to have a five-year-old.

Be the Parent

We had guest speakers at church today - John and Kendra Smiley - authors and international speakers. Their recent book is titled, "Be the Parent: Seven Choices you can make to Raise Great Kids."

Mike and I sat near the front of the group, listening intently and looking forward to employing some of their strategies. Little did we know how quickly we would have to, well . . . be the parent.

On the way out of church, Quinn asked a question quietly a couple times, but I could not hear him. Finally, he inquired loudly, "Why does it smell like farts in here?" Heads turned, I raised my eyebrows and smiled down at him with a flushing face.

I'll wonder if the Smileys have a chapter on that one?

Metropolis

And what vacation could be complete without a quick jaunt through Metropolis (Illinois) where one can take a picture with Superman?

Gulf Shores

The water here was a little choppy, but that made it interesting.

And look! The kids are acting like friendlies.

SHARK ATTACK!

(not really) BUT . . . we had warned the kids about what could be found in the ocean and had strict rules about not going in the ocean alone and not going in past their knees unless they had their inner tube things, so they had a healthy fear.

I'm just glad neither had kept up with the Steve Irvin tragedy, because Quinn got stung or bit or something in the area of his heart at about 7:30 last night. He jumped out of the water and came running up, certain that he had been attacked by something and worried that Mike was going to have to urinate on him.

Instead, we got some benadryl and lidacaine and put him to bed. Looks OK now.

Son on the Beach

So is the daughter.

Sandy white beaches and sparkling blue waters near Destin, Florida were my favorite. The kids are more excited about the stronger waves here in Gulf Shores, Alabama. We asked the lifeguard at the beach why a yellow flag was flying. He told us because there are some moderate sized waves and you shouldn't try to breath underwater.

Quinn's mission is to catch a sea gull, put him in the hog trailer and keep him as a pet.

Mike is enjoying his twelfth Father's Day at the hotel pool with his immediate descendents. I'm enjoying the airconditioned lobby of this nice hotel.

To Battleship Alabama tomorrow . . . Happy Father's Day, Dad!

We've only just begun

Stayed in Chattanooga last night and the kids and I ate at an IHOP while mike made the first pig swap. Don't tell Mike we ate without him - he loves IHOP. Made three pig deliveries today, added coolant, replaced wiper blades and am currently using the computer at a boar stud in southern Georgia (Thank you kindly, Mr. C.). I got a great picture of a boar tour, our first official stop on our vacation. Dirt (more like sand) really is red. Temperature is hot. People are friendly. Trailer is officially empty. Tonight . . . Florida.

Funny things so far: After driving for about 6 hours, Rachel suddenly exclaimed, "We have to stop! My eyes hurt and I can't feel my nose!" I think she's better now. Quinn continues to listen on headphones to the overhead DVD player while working his Gameboy magic. A large clothes basket of snacks, books and games separate the two in the backseat.

Stay tuned.

Gettin' Ready

. . . for our "Redneck Roadtrip." We will post as possible during our tour of Tennessee, Georgia, Florida, Alabama and Mississippi. Rachel is practicing her best Southern accent. Quinn is working on gentility (though I'll probably use a different word for him, just in case he has a vocabulary override and uses a word that sounds more like his privates).

It's Good to have a Job

Quinn's Rant: WHAT?! What do you mean Dad's not home?! He went to work?! In the summer?! I told him and told him that job's no good! Whoever heard of a job that makes you go to work every day?!

My Advice: If going to work every day tends to cramp your style, you might want to consider a job in academia. For further information, please refer to the post titled, "Eighty-Five Days."

Vocabulary Enhancement

Quinn to Rachel: "Get out of my facility! You know that it was Karen who expired me to play this game, not you!"

I think he meant for Rachel to get away from him (and the general vicinity). He was clearly annoyed that she was giving him Gameboy hints when it was his friend, Karen who had introduced him to (and really, inspired his interest in) the game.

Proof

Ah, photographic proof of the existence of Pet Deer. Yeah, it looks a bit skinny and wild-eyed to me. I hope it doesn't show up and try to eat my birthday cake from my plate.

Hey, It's My Birthday!

Mr. Rellim is at the World Pork Expo (where else?!), Rachel is still catching some zzz's and Quinn is trying to conquer some electronic challenge on his gameboy. I'm working quickly on this post so my Dad won't know I'm using his computer. I may have to wipe the keyboard for fingerprints.

This picture was taken after Rachel's spring band concert a couple weeks ago. She plays trumpet well.

New Diagnosis

"Oh, she must be blind sighted," said Quinn as he observed a woman walking down our street. I turned to see the woman and noticed that she was wearing sunglasses and using two thin white canes in a Nordic-track-like fashion. I had to explain that she was not visually impaired, but merely using the canes to increase her upper-body workout. Next, we talked about blindness, visual impairment and the phrase "blind-sided."

Who says kids don't learn things during summer vacation?

Pet Deer

I could only wonder if my father had finally "lost it" as he described in detail how he had made friends with a deer in his backyard last week. As the story grew and he talked about petting the deer and taking two of my nephews to visit the deer, I could only ask, "Dad, could anyone else see the deer?"

I don't think he found that question very funny. I suggested they name the deer Jane Doe. Quinn asked why he didn't shoot it since he was so close. Mike commented, "Lyme Disease is forever."

Good news - the deer is real and hung around the yard for a few days. Bad news - it started eating Mom's flowers and had to be chased on down the road.

Anatomy

Mike and Quinn seemed to be having a good time playing catch with the Nerf football before school on Friday. I looked out the window just in time to see Quinn miss a catch and take one in the face. That wasn't funny, but his response made me laugh. Quinn ran into the house, loudly announcing that he would "never play football again because Dad hit me with the ball in my good nostril!!"

Fresh Frozen Corn

I like it as well as the next guy. But to find an partially eaten bag of UNfrozen Fresh Frozen Corn in the corner of Rachel's loft bed was a bit disgusting. It was carefully wrapped in a dish towel and (I assume) had been used as an ice pack after some injury. However, I have no recollection of the day (or week, for that matter) it was needed.

Any suggestions for this "tweenager" who should be keeping her room clean? Any suggestions for the mother of this "tweenager" as she tries to be patient? Any suggestions for the husband of the mother of this "tweenager" as he listens to the storm?

Day Two

. . . of my summer vacation and already I have forgotten that I ever had a job outside the home. When did I fit that in around my life's activities? I've been on field trips, cleaned (most of) the house, weeded (most of) the many flower gardens, eaten lunch with the kids and swiped a set of golf clubs, a bowling ball and a seed spreader from the neighbor's trash. I've gotten four books started and three more came in at the library today. I cruised the re-sale shops and found birthday presents for two of my sisters. I filed the large stack of "Things To Be Filed" and even planted a few more annuals. Now it's time to fix supper and bake some cookies. Life is grand!

Eighty-five Days

Read 'em and weep! That's how many days I have until school starts in August. If ever, EVER you hear me complain about my job, please remind me of the 85.

Pizza at Villa

What better place to discuss the fine art of flatulence-disguising with the kids. There's the cough, the throat clear, the squeak your shoe on the floor, the door slam and the "Aha-a-a-a!" Not sure how the topic came up, but on the ride home, we learned that none of us has a technique fully mastered.

(I guess you had to be there. . . .)

Bad Smell

Ya ever leave a wet washcloth in your laundry room too long? Well, that's the smell I thought I was smelling and that's why I cleared out the laundry room the other day, looking for the hidden cloth. I was unsuccessful in finding any item that smelled. My thoughts raced to last summer, when the smell I smelled ended up costing us about $2500.00 in plumbing expenses.

On Saturday morning, Mr. Rellim volunteered to check out the crawl space (Are you having visions of Arsenic and Old Lace? - I was.). Within ten minutes, Mr. Rellim surfaced with the corpse of the granddaddy of all chipmunks.

The bad smell in the laundry room has disappeared. Our trash collectors may leave us a note on Tuesday!

Gifted Education

They call it GE in fifth grade. And last night I got a small taste of why Rachel has been selected for the class. As she explained to me: "Mom, I just don't understand why my friend has the ability to meet the requirements to achieve good grades, but is completely unable to think outside the bun - I LOVE TACO BELL! Ya know what I mean? I mean, you have to be able to think outside the box and integrate information you learn and use it in other arenas. Ya know if I had a choice of being intelligent or being wise, I would choose being wise because wise people use the knowledge they have in proper ways. Intelligent people just think things to but can't function outside a textbook classroom. Ya know?

I told Rachel that was insightful, though quite deep for a Monday afternoon.

Better Hearing and Speech Month

It happens in May!

But not at our house. For example, Mike asked where I would like the landscaping rocks and I pointed and replied, "Where the rake is." I know, I know, there's a dangling participle, but bear with me. From around the back of the house I hear a small voice answer, "I have no idea where your rake is."

Hopefully, this post will entertain more than just my SLP and English major buddies.

Does it Count?

After a few knock-down, drag-outs with my electric dryer, I have decided to open the window and vent the exhaust there. The caveat is that this particular window is next to the front door. Does this qualify as a white trash or redneck solution? It's only temporary (promise).

Bathroom Music

I was outside weeding the flower beds last evening when I learned how well sound travels from our bathroom shower to the front lawn. I'm sure Quinn didn't know that either as he was singing the theme song (in his best African accent) of Lion King.

Note to self: Make sure singing in the shower is of songs the neighbors won't mind hearing. And in general, keep bathroom sounds to a minimum when the window is open.

Kelly is Thirty!!

Finally! I've been trying to figure out how to post pictures - again. It seems that each time Mozilla Firefox updates, I need to go through the settings again to blog the way I want.

Anyway . . . here is an old picture of my sisters and me. I'm the cute brunette in the back with the missing teeth. Kelly doesn't have that double chin anymore. Jodie is holding her upright and Jamie is just wondering why the photographer is taking so much time.

Happy birthday, Kelly! We love you!

Pro Nails

Rachel and I decided to get our nails done professionally (well, as professionally as the Pro Nails in the mall can do!). This was our first time and we giggled at each other as we realized that we had trouble understanding the workers' English and didn't know what to do with our fingers and toes.

We also laughed as we noticed that we were the least-tattooed and most fully dressed of the Monday evening clients. If we ever do this again, we may have to wear toe rings to better fit in with the crowd!

Hmmm... I wonder if they were speaking Mandarin Chinese? If so, I may call on my friend Mrs. Bickerson's daughter to help sort it all out.

Smooth Move

While walking out of a department store yesterday, I reached into my purse to slip on my sunglasses. As I put them on, I turned to smile at the person holding the door for me. To my absolute horror I noticed a liner had gotten stuck to the side of the glasses!

I vow to buy a purse with zipper compartments this week.

Planets

While inspecting a mobile of the planets in our solar system, Quinn found one to be missing. From across the library, I heard him ask loudly, "Hey, Do you know where Uranus is? I can't find Uranus."

There was nothing to do but laugh. There's no pretty way to pronounce the name of that planet.

Can't post pictures

This is annoying.

Mexican Songs

Quinn told me he learned about a new song today. He was trying to sing La Cucaracha song. You know? The one where ya no puede caminar por que se falta (you know what) para fumar? As if that isn't bad enough, he didn't understand the words and gestured to me his interpretation of the song. It went something like, "la crotcha . . ." You can probably guess where he was pointing.

Get a Grip!

Quinn unintentionally bonked Rachel in the head this evening with the van back hatch. You'd have thought she was going to die - right there in the County Market parking lot. Rachel climbed into the van and Quinn got in next to her to make sure she was alright. His apology was received with venom and soon words were flying, including this remark: "Rachel, you have no idea what it's like to break your arm or get tubes or have seven surgeries! I've had way more injuries than you and so you had better get a grip!!"

Pro-Life Point

The pro-abortion contingent would like us to believe that the issue is one
of CHOICE. Choice is not the issue we are debating. The issue at point is
whether or not our country is going to give preborn children the same
protection that all humans have under law and under our Declaration of
Independence - that all persons are ENDOWED BY OUR CREATOR (not man) certain
unalienable rights. And guess what that first right ENDOWED BY OUR CREATOR
(not man) happens to be? The RIGHT TO LIFE.

A baby is not a CHOICE. A baby is a privilege and a gift.

Oops! He did it again!

Quinn threw away his retainer in the public trash bin at the nature center. He remembered when we were about 3 miles down the road. I stopped, turned around and dropped him off at the front door of the place to go a-hunting for it. About 2 minutes later, Quinn re-appeared, wiping off the retainer on the front of his shirt. To my absolute horror, he quickly popped it back in his mouth as I screamed, "No-o-o-o-o-o!!!" and ran toward him in what seemed like slow motion to attempt grabbing it out of his mouth before he could close his lips.

Happy Earth Day!

We spent the morning at the nature center enjoying the trails and participating in the scavenger hunt, mural painting and cupcake eating. Several of the trees along the trails are identified with wooden markers, giving their common names and their Latin names. Quinn's friend said, "Yeah, that's how you say 'em in Spanish."

Later on, this friend shared that he was born in Arizona. Quinn said, "Wow! So you know French then?"

Betsy Ross

Yeah, I knew that the 5th grade was doing a play about the Revolutionary War. Yeah, I knew that Rachel has been talking about it for about six weeks. Yeah, I knew that they were rounding up costumes and that Rachel had been practicing lines at night instead of going to sleep. I knew that she was portraying Betsy Ross in her "Laura Ingalls" Halloween costume.

But I DIDN'T know that Rachel had the LEAD in the musical and that it was an hour-long production complete with song and dance. You can imagine my surprise and pride as I watched her sing and stitch and dance at the performance on Wednesday night!

This is a picture of her and her fifth grade teachers who directed the musical. Bravo! Very well done.

Mema is Fifty-ish

Quinn decided his grandmother must be about 50 years old. She thought that sounded about right.

Quinn's Spring Photo

The photographers rushed my pocketbook again. I'm such a sucker.

Speaking of suckers, Quinn showed me a couple of small bites on his arm this morning. I told him they were probably spider bites and he proceeded to attempt webs from his fingers and wrist all morning. So far . . . nothing.

Things Moms Don't Really Want to Hear

I left the house with (who I thought was) the more difficult to manage child. While running errands I received a phone call from the other child (who, apparently needs some extra supervision) explaining:

"Don't worry. The house is a little smoky from the fire on the stove, but I was able to put it out myself by throwing a pan of water in it."

Upon my quick return, I heard screaming from the garage: "The gerbil is stuck!! The gerbil is stuck!!!"

It's Snowing!

On April 14th! In Illinois!! On the day of the 4H BBQ with tables set up outside!!

Tree Frog

Quinn "won" the class pet - a tree frog. He was so excited as he carefully carried the amphibian home in the empty sherbet container. As we exited the school building, Quinn gasped and shouted, "The lid is off!" I shouted, "Put it on! Put it on!" The little hopper escaped and we both screamed and screamed. His teacher quickly came out with a small net and the tree frog was again placed in the container.

I'm sure that his teacher is now questioning the animal's summer home placement.

And Still, The Camry

Why did Mr. Rellim not want to send the Camry to the salvage yard? Why did he insist on driving it 100 miles to the farm? Why did he start his drive at 9:00 pm? Maybe he likes to watch engine fires best at night? Or maybe it was a good chance for him to catch a few winks 40 miles down the road as he waited for a tow?

Seriously, I still do not know where the car is. I just hope my name is not on the title of an abandoned vehicle.

Omelet

On Easter morning, Mr. Rellim made omelets. I commented that Quinn's three-egg omelet looked much too big. He said, "I like 'em that way!" Today he told me that he's trying to put on some weight so he can play football in college. I think there is such a thing as starting too early.

Happy Easter!

The egg hunt was a success, despite 29 degree temperatures. Some of us even scored eggs containing money!

Don't Like the Weather?

Hang around for a few more minutes in Illinois - it'll change.

These are a couple snapshots from last night when it was about 75 degrees. Tonight the weather changed to rainy and 40 degrees. We aren't gonna break 50 for the next six days.

Chicks

I talked the kids into going to Rural King by enticing them with the possibility of seeing the ducks and chicks. Somehow on the 3 minute ride, the possibility of seeing chicks was contorted into the idea that I had made a PROMISE to BUY chicks.

Never have you heard such complaining! Yeah, I know we did buy the chicks one year and raise them in the bottom of a Fisher-Price toy box in the garage under a heat lamp. But, I'm not sure that was completely OK with city ordinances. Plus, we had to move them to the farm as soon as the toy box became too crowded.

I've been told that when I die, the house will become full of pets. No worries here. I know I'll be safe inside the Camry, parked in the old barn on the farm, right?

New Car

2001 Nissan Sentra GXE with 133K miles for 4 grand. Not bad. I will complain about the massive amounts of dog hair between the seats.

You should have seen the look on the seller's face when Mike told him, "Oh, my wife will stop talking about the dog smell as soon as it starts smelling like pig manure."

I thought the man was going to tear up our check right then on the spot!

One More Time

Bad news. The Camry bit the dust. Well, actually it's eaten the oil we put into it and burned up the engine (or something like that).

My plan? Sell it for parts on ebay.

Mr. Rellim's plan? Drive it to the farm one more time (although the mechanic cautioned him to have someone follow him on the 100-mile trip.), and park it in an old barn where someday he will have the to money to pay to have it restored.

Yeah! I remember an old white "hunting bus" that sat against that old barn for many, many years. I don't know if it finally rusted away or if someone actually towed it to a junkyard.

I likened Mr. Rellim's plan to that old man in Galesburg, Illinois who kept his deceased wife in his basement for about 18 years. Nothing good came from that (except the 18 years of welfare checks!) Anybody remember that?

Here's a New Idea

Did anyone watch Oprah today? There was a pastor interviewed who is sending free bracelets to anyone who will take his challenge. Can you go without complaining or gossiping for 21 days? He says it takes at least 21 days to change a habit and wearing this bracelet will help you to become a more positive, happy person. Go to www.acomplaintfreeworld.org to get yours.

Hillary

Don't click here. Hillary fans are also cautioned.

Orthodontist and Otolaryngologist

I can tell you about the lost retainer now that I've sufficiently cooled. You see, like many young people with a new retainer, Quinn threw his away with his lunch tray (less than 2 weeks after having received it). Unfortunately (for him), he was honest enough to let me know that he realized he had thrown it away "right when I dumped my food into the trash can."

So why didn't he reach in right then and retrieve the device? Because he wanted to be the first one to his room for inside recess. They were playing Pinball Panic on the computer.

I told him that one of the first signs of addiction is when you make poor choices (like leaving your $300.00 retainer on the top of the trash) in order to get a fix (in his case, of a video game).

Well, all that's behind us now, right? We took a trip to the orthodontist this morning and got his brand-new retainer (that should last about 3 months, depending upon how quickly he grows). Doesn't he look awesome?!

Oh! Our next trip will be to the otolaryngologist. His eardrum ruptured (again) last night. I thought maybe after about 18 months of being ear-infection-free we had finally left them behind. . .

In the Vent

Doing a little bit of spring cleaning today, I decided to take up the floor vents, wash and re-paint them. Next, I (shudder) reached my hand down into the vents to clean out dust bunnies. Well, what to my disgusted fingers should materialize, but a piece of Quinn's homework from Kindergarten, Christmas tree needles (We haven't had a real tree in about four years.), popsicle sticks, sucker sticks, a quarter, toys from the toddler days in our home and a bottle cap (that certainly cannot be blamed on the children).

I'm taking a break to build up my nerve to clean out the other twelve vents in the house. Could be a long day . . .

Speaking of Hearing . . .

Quinn handed me a paper on which he earned a perfect score and said, "Here ya go, Mom. Read it and week!"

Well, that's more like speech discrimination, but it is quite entertaining.

Huh?

At a recent art festival at the grade school there was an artist who was using a small blow torch to create beautiful glass beads. I noticed that both he and his daughter were wearing sunglasses , but that the audience was not cautioned in any way. So I asked, "Hey, Dave, how long do we have to watch the flame before we go blind?"

"Huh?" he replied.

Immediately, one of the spectators remarked, "Oh, so you go deaf first . . ."

When a CD is not a CD

I took Quinn to the bank to deposit his birthday money. It's never a particularly easy thing for him to do because he knows he will not see that money until he's in college - and even then, the moment will be fleeting as he hands the cash to the book store cashier.

Today, I noticed a sign at the bank for a 6-month CD and seized the opportunity to teach my son about interest. Quinn and I sat with the bank man, who explained how a CD works, we transferred money from his savings account, then signed papers in triplicate.

Obviously, Quinn did not understand entirely because as the bank man stood up, Quinn inquired loudly, "HEY! Where's my CD?! Give me back my money! You said I was going to buy a CD! This is just a letter in an envelope!"

I felt a strange feeling as if I had landed right in the middle of a Mary Poppins video, but was able to calm the child long enough to get him in the car.

We Were Walking Along

when out of nowhere comes a well-groomed neighborhood dog, barking with all his might and charging at us while we were . . . well . . . walking along. I greeted the pooch with a "hide-ho Bailey!" Mr. Rellim on the other hand, decides to charge back with arms spread wide as if he were trying to fly, and making animal sounds like I've never heard in my life!

Poor Bailey made a high-pitched squealing noise as she retreated toward her . . . OWNER (who was watching the entire scene)!!

I wanted to sink into the pavement. Not Mr. Rellim. He said hello to the dog's owner and said something like, "Not much of an attack dog, is she?"

Happy Birthday, Quinn!

Pizza, cousins, cake and fun, triplets rolling & lots of love!

While Mom's Away . . .

. . . Uncle Mike will feed me lots of chocolate cake!
. . . PaPa Wayne will let me walk on the roof!

Quinn celebrated his ninth birthday amidst these family dynamics and many more.

Meddlin' Mama

I hired out Quinn to a neighbor. He was offered a job to pick up sticks in the yard for two bucks. I told him he should go. Anything's better than watching TV all afternoon, right? Well, that wasn't his opinion. After hanging up the phone (thankfully), he yelled, "Mom! When are you going to stop meddling in my life?!"

(Hmmm....."meddling." Nice verb.)

I have his response right here:

NEVER!! Mothers never stop meddling in their children's lives - not as long as they are making their suppers and tying their shoes and making their beds and combing their hair and folding their clothes. Not as long as they are driving them to basketball practice and taking them on playdates and buying them ice cream and dragging them to church. Not even when their kids are grown with children of their own. Not even after they die. How's that, you ask? Because even when I die, you will be saying these exact same things to your children (if there is such a thing as karma) and remembering that I said them to you in the self-same way on a day so long ago.

Acronyms

1981 was definitely less confusing. This morning I had to get on my PC to request an NPI, then register my NPI with DHS and CBO. I had to make sure I had my license number from IDPR as an SLP, which I could not obtain without my CCCs. Then I had to give either my FEIN or SSN for billing purposes with CFC for work as an EI provider. Somehow, this NPI is supposed to supersede or universalize billing by eliminating the need for the other identifying numbers. Hopefully this will all work out. As long as my NPI doesn't begin with "666" I'll be OK.

Shamrock

I was reviewing the meaning of St. Patrick's Day and possible things a shamrock might represent (the green of Ireland, the Trinity, good luck, etc). At the end of the lesson I asked the class, "What can you tell me about St. Patrick's Day? A third grader raised her hand and said, "If you have a shamrock you'll GET LUCKY!!"

Triplets at Six Months

Looks like Holden has outgrown his personalized onesie. But doesn't this picture make it look like it's all happy all the time? Hayden is even giving his first "thumbs up" signal.

Hillary and Barack

Did anyone hear the speeches they gave while they were in Alabama? How about Hillary's attempt at a southern drawl? And Barack's use of "ya'll" while he tried to use a preacher-like rhythm and rhyme?

GIVE ME A BREAK!

I know about code-switching, but this is too much. How can we get a feel for who you are, when you aren't even speaking naturally?

More Fun with Language

This conversation starter happened when my daughter was only two . . .

Rachel: (Holding up fingertip of wax from her ear) What's this?!
Me: Wax.
Rachel: Is there a whack in my other ear too?

This is some syntactic skill along the language acquisition continuum that kids learn regarding the creation of plurals. Can any of my SLP buddies help me out on this one?

Cars

Kickin' back with my nephew, Owen, and watching the Cars video for the first time. Rachel and I made the trip in good time despite patchy snow and much wind . . . and despite a shouting match that left me light-headed.

What was the fight about? Which contemporary Christian music CD to play. What Would Jesus Play?

The Good Ol' Days

I'm longing for them. Remember? When the kids that drove you nuts could be caught? Possibly reasoned with? Or my favorite - hung upside down for a while? My sister and her husband had this Christmas picture taken to capture this memory, I'm sure.

We are only at eleven years here, and already I'm wondering how I'm going to survive adolescence (HA! I almost typed adolescents! Not that they stink or anything. . .).