Friday, November 30, 2007


We just watched this movie together and you should have seen the dance moves Quinn and Rachel were bustin' after the show! Rachel's favorite line was "Demon child!" My favorite part of the movie is watching John Travolta dance and sing as Tracy's mother. Some of the funniest lines are given by Christopher Walken as he is avoiding the seduction by the evil lady. After failing to get his attention, the evil lady asks, "Are you obtuse?!" Christopher Walken responds "I don't know. I failed geometry." This is definitely a gotta see.

Christmas List

Me: Rachel, what do you want for Christmas?

Rachel: I don't know. I already have lots of stuff. I don't need anything. Whatever.

Methinks: What will she think of a donation to the Human Fund? or the FEED THE MILLER BOYS fund?

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Basic Cable

We have basic cable for several reasons, including:
1. If we had better channels, we would watch more TV and we already watch enough TV.
2. If we had more channels, we run the risk of the kids viewing inappropriate material (not that ABC, CBS and NBC don't run their fair share already).

Mr. Rellim REALLY wants to see his Illini play and wishes we had Big Ten Network. So when he wants to see a game he invites himself to a friend's house. That's fine with me. If the game were on here, he would be present in body only.

Anyway, a couple weeks ago he decided to watch the game from a restaurant in town, then came home with the idea that if we spent the money on extended programming, we would actually SAVE money (because he wouldn't have to spend $20 each game on burgers, fries and drinks).

What are your thoughts? Is megamedia necessary? Do you have more than basic cable? If so, will you call Mike before the next game?

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Haunted Pants

"Look! My pants are haunted!" screamed the boy. Actually, it was his gerbil crawling around inside the leg. And, I know - this post is wrong on so many levels.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Naughty or Nice

Click here, here or even here to learn about the incredible elf-o-matic Naughty or Nice Determinator.

Hangman's Curse

It started out like one of Peretti's supernatural thrillers, but ended like a public service announcement about bullying - with spiders. Lots of spiders.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Nose Menace

Somehow, Quinn bumped his nose while running in the dark back to his bedroom. I gave him a bag of frozen corn (It's the best I had a the moment!) wrapped in a dish towel to hold on his nose while I took a shower. Within ten minutes his bunk bed was the scene of an EXPLODED bag of semi-frozen corn. He even had kernels in his pajamas!

Quinn had no explanation.


I thought maybe she was talking about a thrilling novel, but no. It's what Rachel told me she wore one day last week to keep her pants up.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Found 'em

Mr. Rellim drives a 2001 Nissan Sentra. Mr. Rellim is six feet, five inches tall. Picture a gaggle of clowns exiting from a miniature circus vehicle and you will get the visual. Tonight he came in from his vehicle proudly holding the pair of glasses that have been missing for about two weeks. Where were they? Under a stocking cap in his backseat. I don't get that.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007


I think we will be celebrating the holiday three times this week and traveling a couple hundred miles. That's not too bad. And for all my well-traveled friends, I'd like to lift a line from Max Lucado's book In the Eye of the Storm to say: May the trials of your trip be lost in the joys of the feast.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Monday, November 19, 2007


My friend asked her five-year-old son if he'd like to go to the mall and sit on Santa's lap today. He told her that he didn't need to because he had already emailed Santa last night with his wish list.

Only at Big Lots

Never walk into a store and ask, "Where can I buy a hoe?"

I got stunned expressions, directions to hosiery and queries referring to women with questionable reputability.

Next year, I think I'll let the weeds grow.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Change is Hard

Rachel commented that her youth minister wants to create a sort of game room and perhaps acquire a PS-3 or Wii. She said that she thinks that will detract from the business of learning, though she understands that they need to "lure" more kids to church and that could work. "But," she continued, "it's already fun enough there. Why do we want to worry about making it more fun?"

Maybe I'll try that at work when people push reorganization, or the state changes its forms (again). "We are already having fun! Why do you want to mess with that?"

Saturday, November 17, 2007


It wasn't a vow of everlasting love. Quinn made a vow to never get his hair cut again. I told him he WAS getting his hair cut today since we are having family pictures taken on Tuesday. The compromise is that he can start letting his hair grow immediately following the trip to the barber shop.

Done deal, though I didn't shake on it.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Shadow Mission

John Ortberg says that we are all here on earth to accomplish a mission. The Blues Brothers had theirs too. He mentions that many of us are sidetracked by our "shadow mission." These shadow missions, often a bit on the "dark side," can fill our time, but never completely satisfy. (I'm not sure into which side blogging falls.) At the end of the game of life, we all end up scattered pieces in the box - regardless of which of us owned Park Place. Think about how you want to play the game.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Holy Stalling

Do your kids try to postpone bedtime? Quinn hit upon an new strategy tonight.

During bedtime prayers, he said, " . . . and God, now I'd like to play a song for you . . . ." Then he picked up his recorder and played Hot Cross Buns until Mike told him to put it away.

Ya gotta give him credit for originality!

Post Script: A friend mentioned that Quinn could probably sue his father for restricting his religious freedom of expression. Naw . . . we don't live in California.


My friend's son wrote this on his name tag at church, "I'm with stuped."


Every played it? It's kind of like charades. The rules clearly state that no words or sound effects may be used to assist the "guessers" in guessing your gesture. However, at our house it's permissible for some to whisper, "I'm skiing. I'm skiing" while pretending to ski around the living room. It's not OK for me to fingerspell a word.

Overture for Moms

Even if you are not a mom, you have probably had a mom, so you should listen to Anita Renfroe's song.

Friday, November 09, 2007

Family Time

Thanksgiving is only two weeks away and I've decided to start preparing for conversation over turkey and dressing by doing some reading. One book for each side of the family.

Mr. Rellim tells me that I enjoy intentionally provoking others.

Not really.

Only sorta.

Thursday, November 08, 2007


Rachel had a great game tonight. She stole passes, grabbed rebounds, made a few baskets and was stylishly aggressive. She also made the crowd laugh as one shot landed - and stuck- in the crossbars above the board. Wow! There was quite an arch on that ball.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Sixth Grade

Rachel told me that she enjoys her sixth grade friends, but is annoyed by how easily distracted they are and their lack of serious participation in small group discussions.

When I was in sixth grade, I was just trying to get the high score on PacMan at the local pizza palace arcade and wondering when I was going to need a bra.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

New Restaurant

I read about a new restaurant at a nearby Abraham Lincoln attraction. I'm troubled by its motto -
"Finger Lincoln Good."

Sad but true.

Monday, November 05, 2007


Q-tips and toilets do not mix. In case you didn't already know, a Q-tip, paired with other Q-tip buddies, will form a pseudo-screen in the s-curve of your toilet, preventing solids from passing freely. And believe me - we have some serious solids needing to pass!!

Mr. Rellim is looking forward to using his newest Ace Hardware purchase in a few short moments - the Toilet Snake. The children are disappointed. They thought he was heading out to buy a reptile. Not so.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Another Use for Duct Tape

I heard a speaker today who suggested a mouth-sized length of duct tape if you have a tendency toward anxious chatter during emotional crises. Hmmm. . . I'd never really thought of saying NOTHING during an emotional crisis. You?

Hell - The Place

J.P. Moreland says it's not a place of torture, but that it is really a place that demonstrates God's love for the intrinsic value of each individual by allowing everyone to have free choice to accept or reject Him. Never heard it put that way before. (That doesn't mean it will be a fun place to be, however.)

Friday, November 02, 2007

Happy Tossmas

I'm really not into the politically correct facade.
Neither is this guy.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Phantom of the Opera

Some homes were graced with a short, modified rendition of the musical's title track during trick or treat hours!

"The Phantom of the Opera is here!"

Public Service Announcement

From a friendly first-grade witch on Halloween night: You know, your mom should inspect your candy before you eat it because some drunk people make poison candy at the bars just to give to kids like us!