If

"If men of wisdom and knowledge, of moderation and temperance, of patience, fortitude and perseverance, of sobriety and true republican simplicity of manners, of zeal for the honour of the Supreme Being and the welfare of the commonwealth; if men possessed of these other excellent qualities are chosen to fill the seats of government, we may expect that our affairs will rest on a solid and permanent foundation."

— Founding Father Samuel Adams

Finally!

Finally! Finally, one of my little sisters' kids did something bad. But he's such a sweet two-year-old that she didn't even get angry with his artistic interpretation of baby powder. Way to go, Easton!

Quinn did something like this once with creamy Desitin all over his navy blue carpet.

Quinnism

As we pulled up to the credit union, Quinn said, "Yeah I think I've been here before, but I just can't put my tongue on it."

Question

Mom? The bathroom looks really clean. Can I use it? Or are you saving it for a special occasion? Is Grandma coming to visit?
Note to self:
Clean bathroom sinks more often.

Choices

My sister Jamie offered to buy Quinn anything he wanted for his birthday. I suggested that he choose "COLLEGE EDUCATION." Quinn decided he would like to have Jamie keep and maintain a "cuss jar," plopping in $5 for each offense.

Well, I guess that could just about fund a college education.
Good thinking, buddy!

Why is she Laughing?

Is it because someone reminded her of this quote?
"Here sir, the people govern." — Founding Father Alexander Hamilton

Confusion

My grandma's name is Grace. I got nearly to the last sentence in the following message before I realized my sister was writing to me about her dog, Gracie.

"My friend just asked if Grace would be in his new book. . . . So, Grace's page will be "GraceFace on a t-shirt" and I sent him the "Demon Dog" picture along with a normal one. Grace's presence has also been requested at a photo shoot at Ray's Country Estate in Lake Geneva. She has been so difficult these days. Prancing about, preening in front of mirrors. I thought the day she killed the chipmunk was bad enough, now she's famous."

Health Care Plan

Try this one on for size. Thanks for the tip, Doug.

Welcome to Fourteen

Rachel gave me an ultimatum today in Wal-Mart. Either I buy the $7.97 facial cleanser for her or she will start smoking cigarettes. In the house.

I tried to not let her see me laugh.

You Say it's your Birthday?

Happy 12th birthday, Quinn. I love you!

Good Man

Mike went to the library to pick up a book for me that had arrived through inter-library loan. He reported to have been heckled only mildly. I asked why and he showed me the book. Oh. That's why.

Code Switching

Funny Little Girl

I was busy at preschool screenings today, when a little girl walked over to me and said, "I'm here for my 'screaming.'" I pretended to misunderstand, just so that she would say it again.

Any Resemblance?

Rachel. Me. My grandma. I don't know . . .

So Not PC

A Good Word

My dad, who has been retired about nine years, takes care of my nephew some mornings before the bus picks him up for preschool. One morning my nephew said, "You know, Papa Wayne? I'll talk to my dad and see if he can get you a job so you don't have to stay home all by yourself everyday."

Shotgun!

"Shotgun!" It's what Mike and the kids say to call dibs on the front passenger seat. But a word of caution - many people don't understand that meaning when it's being shouted repeatedly by a large man and two tweenagers while sprinting out of the mall toward the parking lot. Nor while leaving church, come to think of it. . .

Crotch Pizza

Imagine walking into your favorite pizza joint and observing a worker in the kitchen reach down into his pants to scratch an itch. It has been years since we ordered what we affectionately christened "crotch pizza." Tonight we stepped out on blind faith to try the place again. Mr. Rellim assured me that the crotch-scratchin' kid has probably moved on (to what other restaurant, I have no idea).

End of story? Yummy pizza.

Regarding Healthcare

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dc_-L4fyLUo

Ray Stevens just takes the words right out of my mouth!

Spirit Week

The Middle School is having spirit week. Yesterday, Rachel dressed up as a movie villain. She chose the Emperor on Star Wars and sported two light sabers. Today I noticed she was wearing her band shirt and I asked if it was "favorite teacher day" or something. She laughed and said, "NO! NERD DAY!"

Oh, yeah. I hadn't taken in the entire ensemble (pardon the pun) before making the assessment. Nerd Day. Definitely.

Found It!

Found my basket of bills hidden under Quinn's bed. Wonder what happened to my checkbook balance? Oh, right - I spent it already. Waiting for payday . . .

Tit for Tat

I took Quinn's telephone for 24 hours as punishment for a certain misbehavior. Later that evening, I couldn't find my purse. Quinn giggled deviously.

I'm still looking for my basket of bills to pay. . .

AFV

America's Funniest Videos. I thought everyone screamed at the TV when viewing them - either in disgust or high hilarity. According to my California and Michigan roommates who viewed the show with me at our hotel room in Chicago, this is not true. And guess what? Some people actually become alarmed at loud noises (like screaming and yelling) while watching TV.

Weird.

Poor Babies

Sighting

Mr. Rellim reported a Mrs. Neighbor sighting while I was away, though I have not confirmed it. Actually, I thought he was trying to flush her out last Saturday morning when he climbed on the roof with the leaf blower to clean out the gutters at 8:00 am. It was a loud, messy, dangerous job. But, alas, she has not appeared to me.

I'm Baaaack!

Five days in Chicago at a conference. Good stuff, but I gave up using credit cards for Lent, so no shopping stories. I did get to spend time with great friends and eat a lot of spaghetti at Maggiano's (Thanks, Steve!).

Our husbands handled household responsibilities well. I received only one slightly alarming phone call. Rachel called the first night away saying that she couldn't find Mike & Quinn (They eventually found one another, but I didn't quite know what to make of that situation.).