Where?

Quinn: "Mom, point under there."

"Under where?"

Quinn: "Ha! You just said, 'underwear!'"

Speaking of which - I thought Quinn was complaining of a stomachache yesterday so I told him to go to the bathroom. He quickly let me know that he did not have a stomachache, but that his underwear were too small.

Yes, they were. What he showed me were boxer briefs that were small enough to fit him like regular briefs. I'm not sure how many years those had been squished in the far corner of his dresser. . . Less sure of why he attempted to wear them . . .

I Love William Wilberforce

"If to be feelingly alive to the sufferings of my fellow-creatures is to be a fanatic, I am one of the most incurable fanatics ever permitted to be at large."

— William Wilberforce, British politician

Wet

I just watched Mike and the kids engage in a Super Soaker water gun fight during a thunderstorm. Though they could get no wetter, they still ducked the guns' sprays. Curious.

More Grammar

Mr. Rellim and I attended Rachel's Middle School open house this evening. One of the teachers who spoke told us that he would be teaching a grammar unit for the first four weeks and it would be the funnest activity ever. I waited for him to chuckle or the other parents to giggle. I smiled widely, yet - nothing. So disappointing.

Caffeine

With enough caffeine (Mr. Rellim required two cans of Mountain Dew "Berry Blue."), one can use a child-sized snow shovel to quickly scoop rain water from the street gutter onto some very dry plants in a flower garden. And although this is not a documented side affect, Mr. Rellim did find that his chronic knee pain was minimal during this period of high caffeine indulgence.

Funny

I went to an informational panel a couple years ago where one of the speakers used the sniglet "agreeance" at least four times. For example, "Mike and I are in agreeance that breakfast is an important part of every day." I tried not to giggle because I was uncertain whether or not he was joking about said word choice. I suppose Mallard Filmore was there too, based on his cartoon today. You may also be interested in a previous post regarding grammar use in the schools.

Raccoon

"Wes told me he saw raccoons the other night," said Mrs. Neighbor. "Wes said they are really big and got into his trash cans and that he's had to strap them closed at night."

I nodded and smiled and walked to the side of the house to continue picking up sticks. It was then that I noticed what Mrs. Neighbor had meant to say was, "Your trash can is dumped over and your trash is spilling into my yard. And I've been home all day today looking at your trash can and its contents spilling into my yard. I've been planning what to say to you all day long about how irritating that is to me, but decided to wait until you returned home from work and play mind games with you. I realize I could have picked it up for you or even just pointed it out to you right away, but I'm crazy-whacko!"

I think I will set our small animal trap near our trash can. I wonder if Mrs. Neighbor will watch a captured raccoon in the trap all day long. I hope her precious pooch doesn't get too close!

Water

Rachel was invited to eat with a friend at a local Mexican restaurant. Before leaving, she asked me if it would be OK to drink the water there.

Words

"The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.'" — President Ronald Reagan

On the lighter side, the most dreaded words to any woman are, "Now please scoot to the end of the table." I told my OB/GYN that joke a few years ago and he reminds me of it every year. Hardy-har-har.

Special

Today was the first day of student attendance at my school. One of the fourth grade teachers was aware of a new student to the district and tried to make him feel welcome in her class. She quickly noticed that he was having a lot of difficulty with writing tasks and began wondering if he received special education services in his previous school. By the end of the shortened school day, she learned that this student had been reported absent from his first grade classroom.

So Says Mallard

Surprise

The surprise lilies are blooming. They are beautiful. It's the beauty that saves them too. Because I know that their blooming signals my return to work. I have about 26 more minutes at home. I will savor my last minutes of summer vacation. Where's the Lucky Charms?

Who is this Guy?

I don't know who he is, but I like what he said here:

"Creative semantics is the key to contemporary government;
it consists of talking in strange tongues
lest the public learn the inevitable inconveniently early."

-- George Will

Canine Care

My six year old nephew told me that his new puppy just got her rabies shot. "You see," said Austin, "when a dog gets that shot in her 'rabie' then she won't have a baby."

If it didn't rhyme, it might not have been quite so funny. But it does rhyme and I laughed and laughed.

Bigger Government

. . . could mean better customer service when ordering a pizza.

Read the Bill

So far, 104 Congressmen have signed this pledge to read the health care bill before voting on it. Super, but isn't that their job? And aren't there 535 members of Congress?

Let freedom ring! Make sure to let your voice be heard by calling your Federal Representatives and asking them to read the bill before voting.

Bungee Squirrel Feeder

Does just what you think. Hanging from a little oak tree in the back. Homemade.

Hobo Bike

Mr. Rellim has needed a big-boy bicycle for some time, but we have had other items to replace - a lawn mower that was spewing gasoline, for instance. Call it luck, karma, fortuitous circumstance, a God Thing or whatever - but guess what we found in a neighbor's trash last week? You got it! a Mike-sized bike needing only minor repairs. So . . . the seat has seen better days . . . big deal . . . nothing a little duct tape can't handle. And the flat tire was just that - flat! - not damaged. As we took it out for a test spin last night, I imagined that young man neighbor staring a bit longer than necessary. The kids call it a hobo bike, but that is all just part of the charm.

Think About This

"A government big enough to give you everything you want,
is big enough to take away everything you have."

Thomas Jefferson